For many same-sex couples working in sport, whether as elite athletes, coaches, agents, or in club and federation roles, the question of starting a family is one that requires careful planning. The physical demands of sporting careers, the pressures of performance schedules, and the realities of frequent travel all shape when and how family planning becomes possible. And for same-sex couples, there is an additional layer of complexity: the legal frameworks that govern how your family is recognised in law.

This Pride Month, we want to shine a light on the two main routes to parenthood for same-sex couples: surrogacy and donor conception. Both are well-established, and both are increasingly common. But both also carry legal implications that every couple should understand before embarking on their journey.

Getting the right legal advice early is key.

Surrogacy

How it works

For male same-sex couples, surrogacy is the only route to having a child who is genetically related. In a surrogacy arrangement, a surrogate carries the pregnancy on the couple’s behalf. In the UK, the vast majority of surrogacy arrangements are gestational, meaning the surrogate’s own eggs are not used. Instead, eggs are donated by a third party or a known donor, fertilised using one partner’s sperm via IVF, and the resulting embryo is transferred to the surrogate.

The legal position in the UK

This is where many couples are surprised, and where early legal advice matters most. Under UK law:

• the surrogate is automatically the legal mother of the child at birth, regardless of any prior agreement,
• if the surrogate is married or in a civil partnership, her spouse or civil partner is automatically the second legal parent unless there is a clear lack of consent given by the spouse/civil partner,
• the intended parents, the couple who will raise the child, have no automatic legal parental status at birth.

To become the legal parents, the couple must apply to the Family Court for a Parental Order after the birth. This is a court order that permanently transfers legal parenthood to the intended parents and extinguishes the surrogate’s parental status. It is not a formality, there are specific legal criteria that must be met.

Key legal requirements for a Parental Order

• At least one of the intended parents must be genetically related to the child (i.e. the sperm donor must be one of the couple),
• the surrogate must give her full and unconditional consent to the Parental Order and this consent cannot be given until at least six weeks after the birth,
• the child must be living with the intended parents in the UK at the time of the application,
• at least one of the intended parents must be domiciled in the UK,
• any payments to the surrogate must be reasonable expenses only. Commercial surrogacy is not permitted under UK law, though courts regularly authorise reasonable payments retrospectively.

Surrogacy abroad

Some couples, particularly those in high-earning sporting roles, look overseas for surrogacy. This is often to the United States or Canada, where commercial surrogacy is permitted and legal frameworks for intended parents are stronger. This can offer advantages, including greater certainty for the intended parents in the country of birth. However, it creates significant legal complexity on return to the UK.

A child born abroad via surrogacy may not automatically be a British citizen. The couple will need to secure the child’s right to enter the UK, and will still need to obtain a UK Parental Order. Taking specialist advice before travelling, ideally before the surrogacy arrangement is even finalised, is strongly recommended.

For athletes with international competition schedules or overseas contracts, international surrogacy carries additional logistical considerations.

Donor conception

How it works

For female same-sex couples, a common route to parenthood is donor conception using donated sperm. Typically, one partner carries the pregnancy, either through intrauterine insemination (IUI) or IVF. In some cases, couples use reciprocal IVF, where one partner’s eggs are used and fertilised with donor sperm, but the embryo is carried by the other partner, giving both women a biological connection to the child.

Sperm donation can be arranged through a licensed UK fertility clinic using an anonymous or identity-release donor, or through a known donor (such as a friend). Each route has different legal implications.

The legal position in the UK

The legal parenthood position for female same-sex couples depends significantly on how the conception takes place:

• if conception takes place at a licensed UK fertility clinic and the couple are married, in a civil partnership, or have completed the correct consent forms, both women will automatically be the child’s legal parents from birth,
• if conception takes place outside a licensed clinic, for example, using a known donor at home, the legal position is less clear. The birth mother is the legal mother; her partner may not be recognised as a legal parent without further legal steps.

Known donors: important legal considerations

Using a known donor, whether a friend, family member, or someone found through a donor matching website, is increasingly common. However, it is one of the areas where legal advice is most important, and most often overlooked.

Without the involvement of a licensed clinic, a known donor may have legal parental status and rights that neither he nor the couple anticipated. If the donation takes place outside a clinic and the birth mother and her partner are not married or civil partners, the donor is treated as the legal father under UK law, even if all parties agreed that he would have no parental role.

• if using a known donor, a donor conception agreement should be in place. While not legally binding in the way a contract is, it records the intentions of all parties and is highly relevant in any future dispute,
• take legal advice before conception, not after.

For couples where one partner is an active athlete, the timing of conception around training and competition cycles is an important practical consideration. We can advise on how to structure legal steps to fit around your schedule.

Shared considerations for same-sex sports professionals

Parental leave and employment rights

Both surrogacy and donor conception trigger rights to parental leave under UK employment law, though the specific entitlements depend on the route taken and the individual’s employment status. Professional athletes on fixed-term or performance-based contracts should take advice on how parental leave interacts with their contractual obligations, sponsorship agreements, and any performance-related earnings.

Estate planning and financial protection

High-earning sports professionals, including athletes, coaches, and agents, often have complex financial arrangements: image rights, endorsement income, performance bonuses, and significant assets. Ensuring that your family structure is legally documented is essential for estate planning. Where parental status is not yet confirmed by a Parental Order or on a birth certificate, wills and lasting powers of attorney should be reviewed to reflect your wishes.

Privacy and confidentiality

We understand that for public figures in sport, the process of building a family may be something you wish to keep private. Fertility treatment, surrogacy arrangements, and donor conception are all subject to strict confidentiality under UK law, clinics and legal advisers are bound by professional obligations of privacy. Family Court proceedings for Parental Orders are also held in private.

Planning around your career

Sporting careers have defined timescales in a way that most careers do not. Whether you are mid-career and concerned about timing, approaching retirement and thinking about the future, or recently retired, the legal process for building a family through surrogacy or donor conception takes time and starting early gives you more options.

How we can help

Our specialist team advises same-sex couples, including those working across the sports sector, on all aspects of surrogacy and donor conception law. We offer:

• pre-conception legal advice for surrogacy and donor conception arrangements,
• review of surrogacy and donor conception arrangements,
• drafting of donor conception agreements,
• Parental Order applications following surrogacy (UK and international),
• advice on parental rights, birth registration, and cross-border legal issues,
• estate planning and financial protection for growing families.

We work discreetly and flexibly. If you would like to discuss your situation in confidence please call us on 0800 422 0123 to speak to one of our family law team or get in touch online.