TV soap Coronation Street has been detailing the relationship between Todd Grimshaw and his boyfriend Theo Silverton and highlighting the domestic abuse that Todd has been suffering at Theo’s hands.
The storyline has focused on the subtle offence of controlling and coercive behaviour. Recent episodes have seen Theo manipulate Todd’s thinking. In a recent episode, Theo smashed Todd’s face into a mirror causing extensive him to seek hospital treatment but then viewers saw Theo manipulate his actions to try to convince Todd that he had fallen and created the injury himself.
Viewers have also seen Theo emotionally blackmailing Todd and manipulating Todd’s confidence. Matters come to a head next week and this highly significant storyline highlights an area of domestic abuse that is so very real for large numbers of people.
Christmas is a particularly difficult time for sufferers of this form of domestic abuse as the festive period can highlight and intensify already tense relationships.
Controlling and coercive behaviour is subtle and occurs over a prolonged period of time. In the majority of cases, the behaviour has slowly escalated over a long period of time to the extent the sufferer is genuinely unaware of what is happening as it becomes a normal part of the relationship. They then begin to question their own thinking and actions, as the offender manipulates their confidence and convinces them – through a subtle series of longer term acts – that they are the ones to blame.
The perpetrator of such behaviour may limit the victim’s ability to either recognise the behaviour or seek help by attempting to restrict their contact with friends or family as well as reducing their independence. Such behaviour may include:
- isolating the person from their friends and family;
- depriving them of their basic needs;
- monitoring their time;
- monitoring the person via online communication tools or using spyware;
- taking control of aspects of their everyday life such as where they can go; who they can see; what to wear and when they can sleep;
- depriving them of access to support services such as specialist support or medical services;
- repeatedly putting them down such as telling them they are worthless;
- adopting a victim mentality so that the victim feels they are to blame;
- enforcing rules and activities which humiliate, degrade or dehumanise the victim;
- financial abuse including control of finances;
- threats to a child;
- criminal damage;
- assault;
- rape.
The list is not exhaustive and controlling and coercive behaviour does not only happen in the home. As the Coronation Street storyline highlights, traditionally 92% of defendants in domestic abuse of that cases were male. However, increasingly, males are being subjected to such behaviour. The difference being that social stigma means that it is less easy for males to seek assistance or even acknowledge that they are sufferers.
How the Family Courts deal with cases involving domestic abuse, but particularly controlling and coercive behaviour
The difficulty with this type of behaviour is that due to the subtlety and long-term effect of the behaviour the sufferer firstly has to be able to recognise the behaviour but secondly have the ability to break free and seek help. As the very nature of the offence is so deep rooted in control there needs to be in-depth therapeutic assistance offered to the sufferers so they can receive the utmost support in avoiding going back into the same situation they were trying to leave.
In particular, sufferers are very reluctant to seek any form of help through either legal channels or police assistance. They have been told over a very long period of time they would simply not be believed and that they are worthless. However, support can include making applications for Non-Molestation and Occupation Orders which can provide protection from violence and harassment.
Of particular sensitivity is dealing with these matters when there are children involved. Urgent applications can be made to regulate arrangements for the children including Prohibited Steps Orders preventing any immediate contact between the perpetrator and the children. In circumstances where there are domestic abuse allegations the Court has to be very careful to ensure the allegations are considered fully and identified at a very early stage as they are likely to be relevant to any decision relating to the welfare of the child. The Court views that domestic abuse is harmful to children as they may face direct physical, psychological and/or emotional harm from living in homes or witnessing domestic abuse.
The Court should only make an Order for contact if it is satisfied that the physical and emotional safety of the child and the parent with whom the child is living can as far as possible be secured before, during and after contact and that the parent with whom the child is living will not be subjected to further domestic abuse by the other parent.
Key to ensuring security and stability for the child and for the parent is having early, clear and strong legal advice as to the options available as well as an understanding of the subtle behaviours that make up this offence. It is crucial to obtain early advice as decisions made when thinking of seeking to support can be critical to securing the safety of the sufferer and the children.
Speak to our team of expert family lawyers
If you require advice, please contact a member of our family law team. We also have offices in Bristol, Cardiff, London, Manchester, Southampton and Taunton.
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